how to understand your relationships

with Alex Iantaffi, LMFT, Transforming Perspectives LLC

A 12-week coaching container for exploring, practicing, and transforming how you relate. Live + online.

Relationships are not just something we “have.” They’re something we practice.

And yet—

Most of us learned about relationships through:

  • family dynamics we didn’t choose

  • cultural scripts we didn’t question

  • systems shaped by colonialism, capitalism, and normativity

So it makes sense if:

  • you feel stuck in patterns you don’t fully understand

  • you want something different, but don’t know what that looks like

  • you’re trying to build relationships that feel more aligned, but keep hitting old habits

This space isn’t about “fixing” you.
It’s about understanding what shaped you—and practicing new ways of relating.

Mentorship pathways:

Queering Sex & Relationship Therapy & Coaching

For practitioners who want to center queerness not just as identity, but as a political lens.

This includes work with:

  • Trans and queer clients

  • Non-monogamous clients

  • Kinky clients

  • Cultural renegades

  • Those diverging from normative relational scripts

We approach queerness as divergence from compulsory norms around sex, relationships, family, embodiment, and power.

This is not “affirming.” This is actively de-centering normative frameworks.

Somatic Sex & Relationship Therapy and Coaching

For practitioners who want to integrate somatic education, skills, and interventions into their work.

We will explore:

  • Trauma-informed somatic approaches

  • Working with individuals and relational systems

  • Embodiment in couples, polycules, and families

  • Integrating movement into therapeutic space

  • Nervous system literacy in relational dynamics

Somatics here is not trend-driven. It is systemic, relational, and accountable.

Centering Disability Justice in Sex & Relationship Practice

For practitioners who want to infuse disability justice principles into every aspect of their work.

This includes:

  • Access as practice

  • Capacity-honoring models

  • Anti-ableist relational frameworks

  • Interdependence

  • Political and structural analysis

This is not about accommodation as afterthought.
It is about disability justice as foundation.

Deepening Our Practice

For experienced practitioners seeking relational, reflective, trauma-informed mentorship.

This pathway begins wherever you are right now.

It is designed to:

  • Strengthen your clinical and ethical discernment

  • Expand systemic thinking

  • Support sustainability and longevity

  • Reduce isolation in advanced practice

This is for those who want depth, not performance.

What to expect:

Every month, you will receive:

  • 2-hour mentorship group meeting

  • 1 hour of individual support

  • Up to 1 hour asynchronous support (text or voice memo via Signal)

  • Up to 3 hours of open office hours

That is up to 7 hours per month of direct mentorship support.

Structure & commitment:

Cohorts begin once a minimum of 4 participants are enrolled.

Group meetings occur Mondays

  • 9–11am PST

  • 10am–12pm MST

  • 11am–1pm CST

  • 12–2pm EST

  • 5–7pm GMT

If enrolling as an existing group (4–6 practitioners), alternate scheduling can be explored.

Minimum commitment: 3 months
Preferred commitment: 6 months

This is to maintain container integrity and relational continuity.

In addition:

  • Quarterly 3-hour workshop aligned with your pathway

  • CE opportunities (including AASECT CEs when relevant; Transforming Perspectives is an AASECT-approved CE provider)

  • 20% discount on CE workshops while enrolled

This mentorship is led by a practitioner with:

  • Over two decades of clinical and international experience

  • Award-winning publications

  • International recognition as scholar and educator

  • Lived experience as a trans, queer, polyamorous, kinky, neurodivergent, disabled person

  • Experience as parent, therapist, supervisor, and cultural worker

Lived experience is not a marketing bullet here. It informs the work.

access & care:

All meetings include:

  • Closed captions

  • No requirement to have video on

  • Space to share additional access needs

Access is not an afterthought. It is foundational to the container.

investment

If you live outside the United States and this pricing is not aligned with your local economy — even at the community rate — please reach out. We can explore a sustainable option together.

20% discount offered to pre-formed groups (4–6 participants) enrolling together at the sustainer or supporter rate.

To balance accessibility and sustainability, pricing follows a three-tier model (inspired by Alexis J. Cunningfolk’s green bottle framework):


Community Rate — $650/month For those with less access to financial resources


sustainer Rate — $850/month For those with stable financial access


supporter Rate — $1050/month For those with greater access to wealth & institutional support


applying to the mentorship

If you are interested in one or more mentorship pathways:

  • Complete the application form below

  • Or book a free 20-minute exploratory call

The application will ask for:

  • Name

  • Pronouns

  • Positionalities you’d like to share

  • Mentorship pathway(s) of interest

  • Why you are interested in this mentorship program

  • Whether you need a reduced rate (honor system; no proof required)

  • Access needs

  • Anything else you’d like to share

This is a mutual discernment process.

Not everyone is a fit for every cohort — and that is intentional.

If This Resonates

This mentorship is for practitioners who:

  • Want rigor without rigidity

  • Political analysis without dogma

  • Depth without performance

  • Community without bypassing complexity

If that feels aligned, you’re invited to apply.